A Wife's Roles in the Family and Church

Though the apostle Paul wrote clear instructions for wives in Christ about their  roles, controversies still rock their supposed roles in the family and in church. It's still asked, what's the wife's roles in the family and church? Hebrews says we should leave elementary teachings behind and go on to maturity. This is one elementary teaching that keeps the church left behind as far as advancing glory is concerned.

First and foremost, wives are expected by God to live holy lives--or to let Christ live their lives for them. If they do this, they've perfected their roles in the family and church. They've pleased God to the max. They can expect being called good and faithful servants. It's really as simple as that--living holy lives. If they seek to live God's life daily, prioritizing it, all the other roles will be added unto them. No sweat. No human effort needed. It's a promise.

But as it is, women's or wives' roles in the family and church have been made complicated. Man's ways always complicate things. God's ways simplify them--and empower them. Yet, church people have been preferring man's ways just to be "in" with modernity, and junking God's ways. Some church women are even involved in so-called women's rights issues, and who's-head-of-the-family and stuff like that. But let's not take it to that level. Let's just talk about women's church involvement.


Women have become too busy in church. The church has got to have this and that, and we women have to be there to see them all happen--and make sure they happen. Why? All of a sudden, God has become a God of activities, as if the thing that will delight him are our church activities and special occasions. We have forgotten that God cannot be pleased except by faith. And faith cometh by hearing the Word of God, not church activities.


How deep are we in the Word? 

Then there are the thousand and one expectations of the church from the pastor's wife. They say she needs to be like this and that. She needs to wear certain styles of clothing, be more friendly, and put on a little make-up and jewelry to be presentable--all of which are nowhere in Scriptures. What the bible insists is to live holy lives in Christ, being submissive to the husband as the church submits to Christ.


How submissive are we, really, to our husbands?

No matter this simple admonition, many women in church still prefer complicated roles. They want to be this and that. They need to do things that will put them in the spotlight. It's not anymore how you live but how you perform in the public's eyes. It's the time you spend on stage rather than in God's presence.

A wife's roles in the family and church should be simply summarized in this: Having Christ formed in them in increasing measure so that they do not live any longer but it's Christ who lives in them. Nothing more, nothing less.

If Christ is seen in them effortlessly (through the Word becoming flesh in them), their families will shine with them and their churches genuinely blessed through them. Their roles in the family and church automatically radiates to full bloom.


The genuine role for women and wives in Christ is just to be deep in God and his Word and live the Word daily in awesome glory. If we can go back to simplifying things like that, that will be powerful! That will turn the world upside down for Jesus.